The most debilitating symptom of POTS is by far Brain Fog. "It feels like a complete mental haze, a dullness, an unpleasant sleep-like state that puts a shitty filter of reality. I'm 26 and I died at the age of 14, when I first got Brain Fog. This is no longer the real me." as a user on reddit describes it. In fact, every time you get pulled into this purgatory that is Brain Fog, it sends you into a distortion of immeasurable proportions. Not being able to see properly, not being able to hear properly, not being able to orient yourself, not knowing what time it is, where you are, how much time has perspired, where you came from and where you're going. You're trapped in a shell, a poor excuse for an existence. You're being robbed of the one true freedom a human has: thought. You don't understand what people are saying, what you're reading, what you're doing, you can't find yourself in your thoughts, your memories fade, the dullness and eternal distance between your soul and the vessel that carried it just a moment ago sets in. Your identity ceases to exist and you become a vegetable trapped in a body that only takes after you in its appearance. You can't yelp out for help, you can't explain yourself - no words come up, no thoughts, except for sheer confusion and detachment. You are no-one. Held captive in a harrowing experience of derealization and depersonalization. You're not with yourself, but you're alone. Hell. You mourn yourself anew, every time the Brain Fog snatches you away. It never becomes familiar. You never get used to it. You die over and over. Every single day. You never know when you'll die again, but you know death is looming and waiting for you at your doorstep, the moment you start finding some comfort in its short-lived absence. How does one keep believing in the hope of life, when you keep being dragged in and out of hell?